“What made you feel the happiest at school today? Or “What do you wish was different?”
“Have you ever felt like you have a crush on somebody?” and “How did it make you feel?”
“Are you scared or concerned about growing up and dealing with your changing body? If so, what makes you scared or concerned?”
“Do you ever wonder how you were born?”
“Do you feel safe in telling me your true feelings? Can you think of an example of things I do, or you wish I’d do to help you feel safer?
“Is there anything on your mind that you’ve been wishing you could tell me but you thought I was too busy to hear you?”
“When you tell me about a problem you’re having, would you rather I just listen and let you talk it through, or would you like me to help you resolve it?”
“Are there some things that I do or say that make you feel like I’m really listening to you?”
“What makes you feel like I’m not listening?”
“Are you afraid that other kids in school don’t (or won’t) accept you?”
“Do you find it hard to talk about puberty and sex?” “Why?”
“What can I do to help us to learn together about growing up?”
“Have you ever seen indecent pictures or videos that made you feel yucky or scared?” “Even though it’s awkward to talk about, can you tell me what you saw?”
OLDER TEENS
“What code word could we use if you feel overwhelmed or pressured when away from us so that we can respond and know it’s time to pick you up?”
“Are you struggling with watching porn at all?” and “Why is it that Porn does not show sex as a loving relationship?”
“Deep in your heart do you think casual sex is right or wrong?”
“Do you think you live for the moment sometimes without thinking about how your behavior might affect another person, or do you carefully consider the consequences of your actions?”
“How do you think you would feel about having to choose between adoption, parenting or abortion if you had an unplanned pregnancy?”
“What do you think about players? Would someone like that be a good parent for your future children?”
“What do you want sexual intimacy to mean? What personal boundaries will you apply for yourself?”
By Tia MacDougall